Optimist or Pessimist? Which One Are You, Really?
It’s no secret that our outlook shapes the way we experience the world. The optimist, ever hopeful and resilient, finds silver linings even in challenges. On the flip side, the pessimist, cautious and wary, might anticipate the storm brewing even if it’s sunny.
A very generalized summary of the two looks like this: On most days, optimists radiate positivity. They approach setbacks as opportunities for growth. Their infectious energy not only influences their well-being but also impacts those around them. Pessimists, on the other hand, often struggle with anxiety, forecasting doom even in the absence of imminent threats.
Think about it: The last time you found yourself facing a challenge, where you able to look at it as temporary, specific to that certain situation, and modifiable by identifying the things you can control?
In his book "Learned Optimism," Martin Seligman, a key figure in Positive Psychology research, explores the idea that optimism can be learned and cultivated. He introduces the concept of the "Three P's" - Personalization, Permanence, and Pervasiveness. Optimistic individuals tend to externalize negative events, seeing them as not entirely their fault (Personalization), view difficulties as temporary rather than permanent (Permanence), and recognize that challenges are limited to a specific situation rather than affecting all aspects of life (Pervasiveness).
On the contrary, pessimists see challenges as permanent, pervasive, and uncontrollable, leading to feelings of helplessness, depression, hopelessness, anxiety, or despair.
So which are you? “The job market is a bit slow right now,” or “I don’t have what it takes to land a good paying job.” Are you “I don’t think I was fully prepared for that exam,” or “I always fail. I’m just not that smart.” Are you “Our team practiced really hard this week,” or “We probably won because their star player was injured.” Are you “Man, this has been a hard week,” or “My life sucks so bad.” You get the point…
Regardless of our mindset, we all have self-sabotaging thoughts from time-to-time. Shirzad Chamine, author of “Positive Intelligence” (I can’t recommend this book enough), calls these our ‘saboteurs’ and points out that they are responsible for our internal thought patterns that default to these pessimistic tendencies. Once we’re aware of them, and able to label them when we see them showing up (I am a recovering “Avoider’ myself), the better we are at shifting our perspective and our mindset, in real-time. He refers to this as our mental fitness, reminding us that we can improve how we see ourselves and our situations through daily practice. The ultimate goal is to handle tough situations with a more positive, calm, and clear perspective, one that can look for and trust that there is a gift or opportunity in each situation, even the hard ones.
Sounds like work, right? Of course, but the alternative is walking around like Eeyore and being annoyed by our Tigger-like friends, family members and colleagues. Yes, he can actually be a bit annoying, but I guarantee Tigger sleeps better than Eeyore at night, as he lays his head on the pillow expecting some good will happen tomorrow, while Eeyore stays up ruminating, thinking Eeyore things.
Speaking of Eeyore, aren’t some people just naturally more pessimistic than others? Sure, but our subconscious mind plays a major role in shaping these tendencies. Our thoughts, beliefs, and reactions are deeply rooted in our subconscious, influencing how we see ourselves and the world around us. Tools and interventions like hypnotherapy can aid in reshaping these patterns, starting at the root of unconscious beliefs or agreements that may have been formed decades ago, but still inform us of how we should think about or act in any given situation.
Hypnotherapy empowers you to discover and transform your limiting beliefs, allowing for a more optimistic and resilient mindset. So, whether you find yourself in the sunlight of optimism or navigating the shadows of pessimism, remember, the power to shift your perspective lies within. Looking to shift your perspective? Let’s connect.
“A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.” Proverbs 17:22